How to achieve commitment in a relationship?
We’ve all met folks who are in serious relationships and envied them. What exactly do we mean when we say “committed”? The majority of couples are brought together by sexual attraction or mutual interests. They are not immediately profoundly committed to one another; it takes time. When you’ve been together for years and made a concerted effort to discuss all aspects of your lives, both the good and bad, you’ll form a bond that’s tough to break.
People believe that relationships are easy, probably due partly to Hollywood promoting this fallacy, but it is a pack of lies. There is nothing easy when it involves a man and a woman. Even just the fact that they are of different sexes makes communication challenging, let alone the cultural and societal gaps that may exist! When two people meet for the first time, they are in the fantasy stage. Everything is perfect, and he or she is the most fantastic thing that could have happened to you. You can’t get enough of each other when it comes to sex. This period can extend for any time, but it usually ends before your first anniversary.
By then, you’d become accustomed to each other and may have taken each other for granted. The overwhelming sexual attraction no longer hypnotizes you, and their habits, which you once found cute, have become irritating. You’ve probably heard the phrase “the honeymoon period is ended,” which perfectly characterizes this time in any relationship.
But it gets worse: you can enter a phase where you only seem to quarrel and disagree. You’ve forgotten about the fantasy stage, and your partner has just served to irritate you. What is going on is a power battle between the two partners, with neither prepared to relinquish ground. People who make it through this era learn to communicate, something that we must do and do well.
Unfortunately, practical communication skills are rarely taught in schools or at home. It’s a pity because excellent communication has the potential to save many relationships. It’s not difficult to learn.
If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to move past the power struggle and into the committed phase of your relationship. You’ve been through a lot together and made it through. The challenges and fights have strengthened your connection.
You love each other and have accepted the differences between you. Yes, you and your partner know each other’s flaws and bothersome behaviors, but you both get them. Having committed partnerships means experiencing profound love, which all couples should strive for.